Secretly Yours
by gummibear09
Summary: We've known each other for years and no matter how hard I try I can't seem to get use to those piercing amber eyes of his. I feel as if though he strips away my disguise, breaks past my hard shell.
1. Secretly yours

I DONT OWN INUYASHA IF I DID...THAT WOULD BE AWSOME!

welcome to...kags diary

We've known each other for years and no matter how hard I try I can't seem to get use to those piercing amber eyes of his. I feel as if though he strips away my disguise, breaks past my hard shell and sees into the deepest realms of my soul. I wonder if he can hear how loud my heart beats whenever he pasts close by, or how my breaths turn into gasps whenever we touch. I try so hard to hide the way I feel but to be honest…I don't want to anymore. I want him more then I think I' v ever wanted anyone in my entire life. Its torture even here sitting across from him, to try and keep my eye from devouring his body and to keep my mind from enacting passionate scenes with him. Ever part of my body aches for his touch, as hard and rude as he is I know the real him, his a loving guy who wants nothing more than to protect and care for his friends .Life has been terribly hard on him and I think he feels that if he puts his walls down he'll be crushed, but I would never do that to him. His heart is much too beautiful and precious to ever even think of hurting. I can't stand it anymore, am bubbling over the edge. I don't know what I would do if I didn't have you to confide in, my dear secret friend. I know what I'll do, once Sango, Miroku, and Shippo fall asleep ill go wake up InuYasha and tell him everything I can't hold on to this secret anymore. Its tearing me apart. By Kami I hope this turns out well…wish me luck.

Secretly yours,

Kagome


	2. A loves confession

By the heavens above and god that lives within, I don't know what I did to please you in such way that I should be awarded so grandly! Dear diary you have no IDEA how happy I am right at this moment. Every insecurity I've held on to for years has melted away like snow in blazing heat the moment his lips touched mine. Last night was by far the best night in my life. I waited patiently for everyone to fall asleep and once I noticed the fire had died down and heard the light snores, I decided to make my move. At first I couldn't find him, even with the dark shadows that loomed around it's not difficult to find InuYasha, what with his red fire rat hoary and bountiful silver hair. But I wasn't surprised when I found him on a tree top holding tessiga on his lap and looking up at the night sky. It seemed like it was well past 3 in the morning and yet there he was, wide awake and beautiful as ever. I must have not been paying much attention, because while I was walking closer to the tree I didn't notice the rather large stone in my path that caused me to trip and fall face first. But before I could hit the ground I was able to catch myself on what I thought was a tree branch, but when I looked up I saw that I had my hands around one is InuYasha's arms.

'"Kagome, what the hell are you doing awake right now?" he scolded looking down at me with a frown taking away his hands and folding them across his chest. He must have known I was here, how else would he have been able to catch me so quickly, and for that matter when did he even jump down from his perch?

"Ooh...am sorry...I...I just wanted to talk you about something" I could couldn't look him straight in the eyes if I did I would forget completely what it is that I wanted to say and I would just stand there staring at him like an idiot.

"Well it can wait till morning, you need your rest. Go back to camp" he started walk back towards the tree when I grabbed him by his sleeve.

"It can't wait I need to talk to be able to talk to you alone, InuYasha" I asked, "Please?"

The emotions that played on his face where mixed, he looked worried, nervous, and frightened all at the same time.

"Sure...alright then" was all he said .He lead the way as we walked deeper into the forest so that we could have a little more space between us and the other back at camp. In my mind I was trying to figure out how in the world I would start this conversation. I twisted and rearranged words over and over and over again and none of them ever came close to my liking. With each step we took that lead us farther the more I wanted to turn back and forget I ever wanted to say anything. Then a voice inside spoke up "kagome why are you so scared just come out and say it. You fight monster and slay demon for a living, I'll be damned if one heartfelt conversation with the man you love be your down fall". It was right

"InuYasha...How long have we known each other?" I asked while we continued walking

"Geez I don't know around 4 and half years" He said answered

Actually to be precise it was 4 years, 7 months and 13 days.

"Sounds about right" I stopped walking "Hey InuYasha did I ever tell you"

He stopped and walked back towards me.

"Tell me what?"

"That I love you"

This time he almost tripped.

"What?"

"Come on InuYasha you're not that dumb, its kinda obvious"

He stood there staring at me, with that adorable look of confusion on his face. Here I was racking my brain to come up with some brilliant way to tell him my loves confession, when just blurting it out worked just as well.

"You...Love…me?" he was taken aback of caorse he quiet obviously wasn't excepting this.

"Always have. I just never had the guts to say it" I looked down at my hands "Just got tired of keeping it a secret"

That's when the most unexpected thing happened. I barely noticed when InuYasha flung himself on me, crushing his lips to mine stealing my breath away. His kiss was rough and far from gentle, but it was the softest sweetest tasting thing this world could possibly ever give. His hand was a clawed fist in my hair as he feasted on my mouth.

"God Kagome you have no idea how much I've wanted to hear you say that" he said breathlessly while he pushed my back against a tree. He left my lips and began to kiss my collar bone "I love you more than life itself"

I could've died then and there I would have been happy. It was the best feeling ever to feel his skin graze across mine. I could feel his rough hand moving from my hips up. His hand had traveled under my shirt and cupped around my breast giving a light squeeze.

"Damn Kagome you feel so good" his voice was husky and deep he said before he kissed me deeply.

I untied the knot the held his hoari and spread open his inner white shirt .My finger were trembling with anticipation as I began to explore the planes of his chest, admiring their smooth skin and strong feel. His breathing began to shudder and his eyes closed as my finger began to follow the valleys between the muscles on his abdomen.

"KAGOME!"

It was Sango, no doubt she noticed I was gone and began to worry for my safe begin. If only she knew in what good hands I was.

"Fuck! Guess our little parties over"

InuYasha but me down and began to re-knot his suit, while I straighten out my hair and fix my half raised shirt.

"Let's finish this later on tonight yeah" he whispered in my ear kissing me then giving my bottom a light smack before he ran off back to his post.

I can't believe how light headed I am right now. His kiss is the most addictive thing I've ever encountered; I can only imagine what the rest of him will be like. Well dear friend the night is giving away to dawn and I should try and get some sleep before we set of.

Lovingly his,

Kagome

oooh nice lol so you know the roll if u want more

i need reviews!

r&r por favor! :]


	3. Clouded skies

Sorry i took soo long to update guys :/ iv had the WORST case of writers-block but with this tragedy came a miricle by the name of whitetiger-

isabella whom am proud to say has a agreed to become co-writer to Secrectly Yours...so enough with the blabing its story time...

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Diary,

Was everything that happened last night, or more like this morning, really real or was it just a figment of my over worked imagination? I mean it had to be real. I can still feel the way his skin rubbed against mine. The way his callus hands pushed me up against the rough bark and the sweat tingling sensation, wherever his lip touch my bare skin. I remember the way he pushed his thighs against me, rubbing his hard erection against my lower abdomen, and this strange sensual throbbing that came from between my legs.

All night I dreamt of how far we would have gone, had we not been interrupted by Sango. I had visions of his lean muscular body, complete nude, pressed against me. Kissing me, with such a hunger that it had sent my head spinning. His hands quickly rob my body of any clothing, as he laid us down on the cold dirt ground and our tongues battled for domination. His hot breath washed over me, raising beads of sweet on the back of my neck.

I could feel myself panting, gasping for air every time his tongue lashed over my feverish skin. Our hands feasted on the other's body with an undying hunger. Gods the more he touched my body, the more i seemed to cry out for his touch, for him. In that moment I wanted him, I craved him. I want…no NEED him. I needed him more than life itself. I don't care what may happen from here as long as I have him…I'll be perfectly fine.

But like all good things. It had to come to end. And this was no exception. For I was rudely awaken when the Gods deemed the clouds to break and drop cold water that had soaked everything within minutes. It had happened in a blink of an eye for those that were awake. And when the cold rain hit my skin and made me jump up. Although I thought that I had heard someone snickering quietly from behind me, and in my rush, I could have imagined it.

Everyone quickly gathered everything as InuYasha led the way to finding shelter from the rain. It wasn't long before we came to a cave in the side of a hill. And it was in this shelter that I tried to see if last night was really a dream or if it almost really happened. But when I tried to move a little closer, to see if he would brush against me, or even give me a look… nothing. A big fat nothing. Maybe it was all in my head…But it had felt so real. I don't know which god I angered up in those cloudy grey skies, but this is by far the worst punishment I could ever receive. It's taking all my strength to keep these treacherous tears from brimming over, and biting my lip to from screaming out a frustrated sigh.

Why, why couldn't it have been REAL, why won't this pain go way, why won't he LOOK at me? Question that buzzed in my head as I lay on the cold stone floor watching the world cry over the dry forest ground, letting the darkness of my mind fade me into yet another restless sleep.

This poor misguided heart,

Kagome

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not a long chapter but its defitnity set up our story plot soo ... as always reviews are greatly appreciated and if u have any opinions or story ideas please feel free to let me know how u feel

thanks a million guys,

Gummibear09


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